She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Randomize
