There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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