Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
