I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Randomize
