I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
