i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Randomize
