Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize