What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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