Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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