no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
