Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
And then he peed in my hair
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