im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
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