can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
