First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
