I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize
