she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
