...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
