how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
