love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize
