How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Randomize
