OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize
