The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
