You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Randomize