What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
