I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
