so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
