You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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