the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Randomize
