I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
