Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
