there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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