don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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