Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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