that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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