Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
