we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
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