Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
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