sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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