I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
BRING THE BAGELS
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize