I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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