discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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