Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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