Christians are straight up FREAKS
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Randomize
