so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
