it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
