We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
