I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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