quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize