We're like a lot better than the average bears
I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
