Ambien. No doubt about it.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
we're making bets on your personal life
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
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