The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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